Brandy’s Journal

Right after the social I am driving away to my favorite thinking place for a four-day weekend retreat. I’m pretty much packed. The bed in that hotel is very hard so I’m bringing a cushion. I’m also bringing about 20 reference books. This time, for the first time in years, I’m not working specifically on an OTO presentation, but instead doing a deep dive into humanist metaphysics. Last time I did a retreat I wrote a ritual but I didn’t have time to write the explanatory essay. Now I’m working on the explanatory essay. Instead of starting on it here, I’m going to disconnect and work. The output will show up in a couple of ways, certainly in a Pantheacon proposal.

Back on Tuesday. Enjoy the weekend.

The items that jumped out at me:

• Watch your diet, times ten.
• Possibility of conflict and emotional flutter. Solution: stay private and avoid possible public scandal.
• Focus on philosophical study and dreaming. Find an anchor to tie to before diving deep. Make no major life decisions and sign no legal document. Also remember people do lie to you.
• Lots of travel for a restless soul.
• Family still important. May lose friends, will gain some, especially women. New close friend or lover.
• Final year to pay off a karmic debt.

Or:

• We are what we eat.
• Our lips are sealed.
• Dreaming is free.
• On the road again.
• I got all my people with me.
• Up ship and all debts are paid.

Today I can’t move. I’m just barely doing the work I need to keep up with. At four I sat down on the couch and crashed hard for two hours. Last time I was this tired was Merrymeet 1990, and I was 18 years younger then.

Partly the physical work, partly the magical work - that OTO third really takes it out of the initiator. It’s psychedelic, I keep flashing back on visuals and phrase fragments. Oh, it was worth it, though. There’s a magical thrill in there, totally aside from how rewarding it is to initiate and how appreciative the candidate was.

Tonight’s plan is to sit on the couch. Ted, wonderfully, is bringing dinner home. We may watch a samurai film.

Week schedule:

• Tuesday: another OTO day, visit Tacoma to set up bank account and connect with initiate, then officer’s meeting.
• Friday: my birthday! I am taking it off. Still not sure what I am doing in the evening.
• Saturday: sis, nephew, Alex and I go to Kitsap Forest Theater. Fair afterwards?
• Sunday: nephew and I are going to see Extreme Bulls at the rodeo.

Between Olympics I forget how many weird little sports there are. Beach volleyball (Ted: “that’s a sport?“), water polo, field hockey. I’ve watched judo, fencing, white water kayaking (this is insane), baseball, softball, tennis, table tennis, synchronized diving (that was spectacular,) biking.

Amazin performances. I watched Venus Williams and Roger Federer lose. I watched Chinese gymnast Yang Wei win the individual gold. I’ve watched every swim of Michael Phelps. He’s a fish, right? Actually the talk of my business meeting was the breakfast this guy eats–he requires 10,000 calories a day to keep that body going. Wow.

I primarily watch Canadian coverage because the commentators shut up and let you watch fantastic performances, while the American commentators are in an air time contest with each other, boring. As a side effect I know more about Canadian athletes than about American ones.

Just for the record, I am death on women’s gymnastics. By “women” we mean “little girls” who have been driven, starved and punished from five years old, at tremendous cost to their developing muscles and bones, and in some cases to physical ability or life. Girls are paralyzed and die chasing their parents’ dreams. Men’s gymnastics are about strength, girl’s gymnastics about being small, which reflects Western culture’s gender mapping. Gah. That sport I do boycott.

The emphasis is on nationalism, flags everywhere, and on winning. I feel for the Chines athletes, under such pressure to deliver gold. One Canadian fencer turned on the camera and snarled that she was sorry, she wasn’t going to fulfill their medal hopes. None of that is what motivates my watching - at the top of the world, where one-one hundredth of a second separates medal winners, luck plays as much a role as talent and skill. I am interested in excellence. It’s a heck of a show.

Alex, Ted and I drove out to ROTOCAMP, the regional OTO campout. Two hours to the Longhouse. We listed to “Wait Wait Don’t Tell Me.” Once on site we set up a couple of chairs and a tatami mat under a tree for a day camp hangout place.

First event, Mass in the circle of stones. A very interesting experience since I’d seen a lot of Pagan ritual in that circle. It was my first outdoor Mass. Babalonyieh and SGIJim were the officiants. They did a great job of handling the veil flapping in the wind, which was about the only outdoorsy kind of thing that happened. (Aside from the possibility of rain which prompted the team to delay setup until the last possible minute.) The Mass is a pretty powerful energy, it ran quite well. (Crowd count of 29 plus Mass team.)

The sun did come out and singe us. Alex got quite burned, and the priestess picked up an interesting lozenge burn on the underside of her arm from the reflection of the paten.

We had lunch at our daycamp hanging out with the other Vortex member who came out. Although we were billed as co-sponsoring, we had provided nothing to the event - no planned activity or equipment - so we were very pleased to see that our member was camping out all weekend and pitching in as a temple steward. The three of us did our best to help as well, although there wasn’t a lot of work that wasn’t already covered.

Hung out and talked to folks. When rain started we struck our daycamp. I napped. We moved straight into the Minerval, which had been set up in the sun. As the ritual started the rain kicked in, and turned into an un-Northwest-like torrent. I had an umbrella - I think I was the only person there with one, actually. We’re tough, we can take a little water, except that it’s usually a bit of mist, not a soaked-to-the-bone affair. I ran back to my car to get a blanket and jacket for the Minervals. They needed them!

Had a bit of feast, then started the drive home. Still me driving, now soaked. The guys napped while I listened to the game. Once home I took a warm shower and got into dry clothes, and then we all trooped out to Appleby’s for warming food. Then to Safeway for the pre-Mass run.

Sunday:

Another day, another OTO event, this one the regular Vortex monthly Mass. I’m getting toward the end of my tenure as body master, and I’m wearing down, but whenever I get on site I am revived. I love my body and the people and the energy. It was a lovely Mass with a lot of energy. We actually had seven attendees, which is about as low as we get. August Mass is when OTO events usually happen. I’m certain we’ll cancel next year for NOTOCON.

With only a dozen people in the room I set up our post-Mass potluck as a family style table, setting the table with plates and utensils, and having us pass the food around. Buffet style is more effective for getting food to people, but family style is great for focusing on conversation. Someone said they were thrown when attending an event at another body because there was no food. I pointed out that every event we have includes food sharing. Food is communion. I’m deeply influenced by Elizabeth Johnson’s analysis of the (Christian) communion of saints, which begins with the living community.

Oh, I had a fast paperwork session with the officers throughout the Mass. For the very first time I have officers doing all the Grand Lodge paperwork, neither Ted nor I are doing it. Woot!

There were only four of us stowing the gear and cleaning up after the potluck. We strike the Mass before the potluck, a happy side-effect of using the same space for both events, but we still have to get all the stuff in lockers. Then we did a tyling workshop.

On our way home Ted and I swung by the initiation closet to pick up stuff. I got a chance to sort and organize the stuff, which made me very happy. I plan to label boxes this week.

When we got home Ted crashed. We really are getting a little old to be carrying this large a physical load. We still have more energy and do more work than the young folk, hah. It comes with a cost though. I did my laundry (soaked clothes from campout) and did some prep work for the init next week.

Today is another init and paperwork prep day. Next weekend is another OTO weekend. Then I have a family weekend which includes my birthday. Then I have a weekend off. I’m looking forward to this. I have a lot of ideas banging around in my head that I want to write down.